Playmaker2

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Bit of a background. I've been with my girlfriend for almost 2 years now. She is a very nice woman and I enjoy my time with her. However, she lately, in the last 5-6 months, has become less and less interested in sex. In fact, right now, it's been 5 weeks since we've last had sex. I've told her how big of a deal it is to me, but she said sex isn't a big thing and right now she just doesn't want it. She also doesn't give oral sex anymore either. Before, if she didn't want to have sex, or was unable to cause of "that time", she would be more than happy to do so. Lately, not at all.

Anyways, the real reason is that one night she left her e-mail open after using my computer. I came back and in her inbox was an e-mail from an old friend of her's from the Army I think, maybe Navy, who has a crush on her, but he is married. This guy has been sending her e-mails, and the one I read talked about how we and her were going to rent a hotel when he comes into town next, and do dirty things to each other, ect.... My girlfriend had replied before that it sounded hot and made her wet thinking about it, ect...

Now, I know that both of them have a real sick sense of humor, which is fine. So do I. But this seems to be crossing the line. However, how do I bring this up to her? I mean, the only reason I found out about it was checking HER e-mail, even if she did leave it sitting on my computer. Plus, I'm almost certain she'll try to say it was a joke. Do I wait and see if it is serious or just a joke, confront her now and not worry about how I found out? I'm very confused here and could use some ideas. Thanks.

BackdoorJesus

BDJ Seal of Doom on this relationship.

1: you're 24 - you shouldn't have a long-term relationship going on.
2: flirting w/ other guys + unsatisfying sex = girl looking for something better.

My advice - kick her to the curb ASAP before she does it to you. Also do not get her shit for the holidays; a nice present won't save this relationship anyway, so don't think it will. Save your money & dump her before the holidays. Trust me on this, I have been in your same predicament (albeit a few years older that you at the time); this is a standard scenario for relationship failure.

If you have to be in a long-term relationship, recognize that this is not the one you should be in. Run like hell.

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SC/TGrandAm

Right on.

It's not that shes lost interest in sex, because she hasn't...she's just lost interest in sex with you. Chances are shes getting it somewhere else if shes acting that way because most girls if they really like it they can't go without it just like men can't.

I'd say shes going to break up with you she's just keeping you around for some reason, either until she finds a stable relationship elsewhere or your providing her with something. (either a place to live, money, etc).

It's time to sit down with her and talk about it and if she wont talk about it, i would cut my losses now and walk because there will be a reason she wont talk about it. She can't give you the "i dont want it right now" excuse because thats 100% bullshit.

powder19

I'll have to agree with these guys....I don't know how much more of an obvious sign she can put out there that shes not into you anymore, more so not into sex with you. And dirty emails back and forth with some other dude doesn't fly....I'd say move on, but thats easier said than done when you've been with someone for awhile, its up to you if you want to keep getting hurt, or move on and find someone better...good luck

Juan.©amaney

OMG you are seriously in here asking?

Sounds to me like you are in denial and trying to convince yourself you aren't getting dumped/cheated on.

Dude, your relationship has been over for a while. You need to leave. Don't explain anything to her either. Just leave lick your wounds and don't give her the satisfaction of any explanation. Leave the bitch wallowing with no closure.

I really hope you don't live together, since you didn't mention it.

Run...run fast....run hard....never look back.

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hirollcenter

ditto ditto ditto...The party is over,the fat lady has farted the game is over,not a chance for a tie...

timmyJL

She is not woth it. It will just end with your heart getting broken.

Walk away is my advice.

Green Eyes

The fat lady is singing, my friend, your relationship is about shit out on you. In my opinion, it's in your best interest to follow the advice already given here.

Playmaker2

Thanks for the help everyone. It was nice to get some opinions that weren't skewed like mine are.

Juan.©amaney

Love kinda has a habit of doing that and don't worry, we've all been there.

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SC/TGrandAm

Yes we definately have.

As everyone knows Ive had advice given to and i give advice back in return when I have some. I just had a simular situation a few months back, yes it sucks if you really love them. Coming from experience its best to cut your loss now and walk, yes you can mend the relationship in some instances, but its a temporary mend ive found out... before long your back in the same shit and your heart gets crushed again and again. Basically your just prolonging your agony and making it 100% harder if you stick around with the idea thinking that your going to fix this relationship, you got too much going against you in your situation to fix anything.

Look at it this way its out of your control now, your wasting time trying to fix something that you have no control over. And you know what, if you have that doubt that you might want her back someday, the best thing to do right now is walk and don't look back, lose contact not fully but 95% and be shady. If she calls dont answer, if you do answer keep it short and say your really busy and that you will call her back and DONT. Get a new girlfriend or if you don't make it look like you have one, this will make her jealous if she likes you. Soon enough if she really loved you the whole time she will be back knocking on your door or doing anything to get your attention becuase for one she will be jealous and have a challenge and miss you at the same time. If she does that and you still like her then the ball is in your court...do what you will. That doesn't work in every instance, if she doesn't like you or love you sorry but no chance in hell.

OTD

I have to agree with all the above, this relationship is done and the only reason she's still around is because it's easier than leaving. You need to make the move and go, it may seem to be extreemly hard to do right now but as you get some distance and look back you will be glad you didn't waste anymore time.. Life is too short to be spending it with someone who is not the one.....
Just an old farts opinion.....