dan700

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I knew she would be upset, but damn, I didn't know she would be THIS upset. We're practically on the edge of divorce here because she claims that watching porn is the same as cheating on her. Any of you guys have similar experiences with this sort of thing? Kind of on my last rope here.

msub

My ex-girlfriend was also upset when I told her I jerked off the pr0n. She also made a similar comment relating porn to cheating.

Although our relationship ended for much different reasons, and the porn wasn't such a big deal. Maybe offer to watch porn together? It'll have to be lame ol' "tasteful" porn though.

maggiesdragons

Sounds like she is insecure about her self, all women know most men watch porn, or have some type of porn. question is, would she ever watch some with you, if you can't see that happening then I would try and live a life with out porn... will be hard, but is the marriage worth it? If so, let her watch you delete it.

Basically what I'm getting out of it is that she feels that she isn't good enough for you to not look else where for your jollys, let her know that she is good enough for you.

fmb

I'm gonna have to agree with maggiesdragons on this one; many women feel their man watching porn is cheating. I don't believe that vision will change in the near future. Some ideas: delete it, password protect it, or talk with her about it (tough one!). As you already know, there is no easy solution here!

Juan.©amaney

First off, you should have been upfront about it.

Second, she needs to get over it.

Third, how the fuck did she find it? Is she snooping through your shit? If so there are trust issues. If you just left it on the screen, go punch yurself in the balls a few times.

Lastly, work it out. She is probably more angry that you hid stuff from her and feels betrayed. They are just videos and maybe pictures. Unless you havent touched her in months because you are too busy whackin off, then it aint worth a divorce. Seriously, that is so absurd.

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Juan.©amaney

Oh, and yeah, back when I was into porn I went through this with the ex. I'd watch porn at work because no one cared, and would get all worked up and then go visit her and she thought I Was just happy to see her...which I was, but I mean damnit. Once she found out she put two and two together. I told her I stopped, which I did for a while, but turned out the bitch wasn't worth it anyway...but I digress. I don't look at porn too much anymore and when I do, I tell the gf now and she laughs and calls me a dirty boy. She doesn't like it herself...chidlhood trauma, but she doesn't care if I look at it...she's used to it cuz her brothers watched it all the time.

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Queso

i don't see any issue with a guy watching porn unless, like juan said, they prefer jerkin it to porn then having sex with their woman. talk it out with her. maybe you could incorporate it into the bedroom. sounds like a good time to me

Nifty

Yeah, I've really got nothing for you on this one. My wife knows I watch porn, she watches porn, we watch porn together, porn separate...shit she even buys the porn. Like someone mentioned earlier though, I gotta wonder how she found it. If she found it while snooping I think she's the one that should be more embarrassed here. If that's the case she doesn't trust you. And to get THAT bent out of shape about girls that you'll never touch, let alone fuck is ridiculous.

fmb

Hmmm.... Good thoughts, Juan. I hadn't considered those.

Juan.©amaney

I talk to waaaay more women than guys and I asked for a lot of help because I actually cared for the miserable girl. I wasn't always a dick.

They all came to the consensus that getting turned on by other girls and then using them to relieve themselves isn't the nicest thing in the world. They're made to feel akin to the sock you use to wipe your jizz with.


In all seriousness, the problem here wasn't the porn, its a little deeper than that. Sometimes as men we fail to look deeper and just want a quick fix "OK DELETE THE PORN AND SHE'LL SHUT UP!" Nope. Talk to her...or better yet, let her talk it out, then give her a hug and a kiss and an "I Love you" and kiss ass for a few days.


Seriously though, snooping through other people's computers is not cool.

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abcde123

2 years ago the same thing happened to me. We weren't near divorce, but it was really rough for quite a long time. The good side is that now things are better than ever.

She was really hurt; felt like she wasn't pretty enough, like I was basically cheating on her. Because I hid it from her she instantly began questioning everything I did and said. "If you were willing to lie and hide this, what else are you lying about...?" She was dealing with insecurities - and I think most women do to some extent. I apologized left and right, cleaned up my act, curbed anything for awhile that she might worry about... it got a little better. The turning point for my wife was about a month later when, after another arguement I said "I might as well have gone out and had an affair for the way I'm being treated." Eventually we both started excercising, losing weight, getting in shape, fixing our relationship. She realized that my love for her was not in competition with what I had been looking at. etc... Now things are great. She still doesn't like porn at all, but she likes to look at NN sometimes with me.

All I can say is hang in there...keep letting her know you love her, that you are sorry for hurting her. Maybe things will turn out ok on this one.

kulotsalot

#bug

facepeeler

I had a friend of mine who's wife honestly divorced him over what she called a "serious addiction" to porn because she found like 4 movies on his hard drive. She came to me bitching about it, and I told her to get over it, porn's not that big of a deal.

Hell, my gf now will watch the shit with me on here, and she points me in the direction of new porn.

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Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Juan.©amaney

no bug

4 movies? Really? Wow.

Again, the point to focus in on here is not that its porn, its the lying, hiding, betrayal, low self esteem thing that women get. To guys, rubbing one out to some chick pouring honey on her bits is just time alone. To a woman, its deeper, and more thought out. Hence women porn tends to be in the form of romance novels, and guy porn is that two chicks one cup type stuff....or a little less extreme.

Unless you get one of these crazy WR broads...then its just fun for everyone.

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