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Hi,

I have just met a new girl and we have been doing it for a couple of weeks now.

The thing is she is quite shy and doesn't want me to see her naked body (i.e. we always have all the lights off or the covers on) (She has seen mine plenty though).

When I say shy, she told me she had councilling for confidence/ shyness issues when she was 18/ 19 (we are both 24 now). The thing is, to look at her/ talk to her now, you would never have guessed she had/ needed any of this. I guess she is mainly shy when it comes to intamacy.

She has had 2 boyfriends before, so it's not like I'm the only guy who has ever seen her nude (I assume :eek3

She has a pretty good body but I'm finding it impossible to get her to be more 'open' about this.. I've never had this problem before though, so what should I do? am I being impatient/ selfish? Will she come round over time?

Thanks

Juan.©amaney

Wait. That's all you can do. The more you nag, the more you will piss her off.

So basically, wait until she is comfortable and thats it.

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Queso

you could try sneaking into the bathroom when she's taking a shower. she may get over the surprise and shyness with a little shower sex

fmb

I wouldn't sneak up on her just yet.... Let her get used to you and the relationship. I think if you don't make a big deal out of seeing her naked, some of her fears (or phobias) may recede. Also, if you do see her naked, don't make too big of a deal about it. Try showing her it's okay and natural for two folks to be naked. Together. With the lights on. Without covers.

Don't worry too much about it; give her time!

Green Eyes

That's the exact advice I would give.

crizzycruz

kulotsalot

No sneaking in while she's in the bath - that's cause for a serious freak out for someone who's really shy about her body. Wait, and don't make a big deal of it when she *does* slowly come out of her shell. Do not encourage or make any sort of comment about how "it's great that you're doing this!" because it means that you're noticing... and that's the worst part about it is that you DO NOT want it (nakedness!) to be noticed.

You might wanna try the romantic, candlelit sack session approach if you think it might work, but definitely DO NOT give her a hard time if she insists on blowing out every single one of them before she strips

I personally have had too many head-butt incidents with lights-off sex that I try to avoid it if I can help it. Nothing ruins the mood more than a sharp crack followed by two people saying "Ow!"

RonGoldman

It's not your issue to fix, but you should try to lead her towards getting help. Those kind of self esteem issues can fuck up a relationship fast. If she can't get over her self esteem issues it'll cause all sorts of problems.

maggiesdragons

Get an old shirt and shorts that you don't' care about and each day have her put them on and cut a little off until there is nothing left, have her do this in front of you so that you get to see a little more of her each time.

malichi

bro, my gf was the same way She had one bf before me and was very shy about everything. She wouldnt let me touch her breasts and certainly not between her legs. Even when we did do it she would keep her shirt on and tell me never to look down... ;-) Eventually, with time, I was able to get her a bit further each time. Now she will do it with a dim light and fully naked. Now I can touch and do things with her breasts. Now I can play with her and she will let me watch her do oral. Before, none of these things would have happened. It all took time and patience. It took lots of talk and assurance. Hope this helps

fmb

Stick to the basics: don't rush things; maintain the naked as normal routine; don't criticize, and be supportive.

JacksonAces

Agreed with everyone else. No rushing things, let her get used to the idea, etc. But one thing to add. Do you tell her she's beautiful? As in, when she is fully clothed and just does something that makes you happy? Or when she wakes up in the morning? If self-esteem issues are the problem here, which I imagine they are, sometimes something as simple as telling her that you think she is beautiful can make all the difference.

My gf sorta had the same thing. No one in her life, not even her rents, told her that she was beautiful. Now, loads of people thought and expressed that she was cute, but it's not the same thing. When I finally saw her naked (or nearly so, I can't remember) and told her that she was beautiful, she almost started crying, because I was the first person to actually say that. The fact that I express it is sort of a big deal to her, and it makes her happy, so rarely a day goes by that I don't tell her.

Maybe you should try something similar. Don't try to link it to trying to get her naked, just tell her she's beautiful when ever. It will make her smile, or blush, which is even better. Ooh! try whispering it in her ear when you're at a party or in a public place. She may blush and act all shy, but it will be a re-enforcement of her self-esteem, and will make her more confident about herself.

Hope this helps

~jack

Devone16

I know it may sound wierd, but enjoy the shyness. My girl was like that for years, so I bought her some boobs, and worked her out of the shyness (over a six year period)til the point where she was acting like a whore everytime she wanted to go anywhere. I understand your pain, but just giver her time and let her do her thing. Constant encouragement and reassuring how beautiful she is always helps.
Good luck.

WordUpDogg

Re-assure her by feeding her a bunch of BS about how her body is beautiful and how much you love it.

You just gotta convince her of how much your attracted to her and she'll probably be ok with it.