murphy_green

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Okay, everyone, check this out: There is this girl at my work (yes, ignoring the fact that work-place relationships rarely ever work out), and I think she has a thing for me. Thing is, I think I might feel the same way, and weh ave a lot in common, and we have a lot of fun together. Here's the catch: I'm 23, she is 17. Is that a bad thing, or wierd, or just unlucky? Any thoughts, advice, or past histories would be greatly appreciated

kulotsalot

Things to think of:

1. What is the age of consent there?
2. Are you prepared to find another job if it doesn't work out?

I think this will be one of those fun, summer fling-esque types of relationship. I'd say go for it if you just want something light, fun, and for-now, but don't expect happily ever after.

murphy_green

Age of consent is 18 here in Australia, but that isnt the prmiary objective, aat least I think. And another job? Pretty much out of the question since I just got promoted to 3IC in my department.

travcook

I agree with Kulotsalot... PERFECT summer fling material....as long as it's legal

skept

Age of consent is 16 in australia.

Age of legal drinking is 18

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Manning1985

look at it this way when you were her age how old was she.

fmb

Approach with caution and remember your ability to continue gainful empoyment may rest on this relationship. Think about the words posted so far, especially those of kulotsalot.

ekawpu

if memory serves, 16 is legal age for girls, 18 for guys, altho your in the safe either way, jus thought id add that :P

personally, if i was 23, i wouldnt date a 17yr old, but thats jus me, everyone is different..

umpire00

I would be careful about it since you don't want to jeopardise your job over this.

kulotsalot

Doesn't matter if sex is the primary objective or not. It is part and parcel of most relationships, so if she is underage, you better think twice. I'm not saying forget it, LOTS of underage sexin' going on, just make sure that she won't freak and go running to the authorities, coz if she does, your life is pretty much over.

As for the job thing, think of it this way: Unless you intend on marrying this chick, the relationship will have to end at some point. (Actually even if you marry her there is still a chance that it will end, but let's not talk about that.) So since a breakup is pretty much a given, a month, a year, 5 years from now, you'll have to think of the logistics of the breakup and how it will affect your work. You say you can't leave. Fine. Will she/can she leave? VERY FEW people manage to do the mutual, drama-free breakup, so assume that yours will be full of drama, and plan accordingly.

So point 1 seems to be unclear, we've got conflicting info from a bunch of Aussies here. Point 2, however, is crucial, and just based on that, I'd say right now it looks like it's not worth it.

supersatch

I second kulotsalot's opinion. In all reality it doesn't really matter what your age is. She's seventeen. And that will almost guarentee a messy breakup. Not to mention such a relationship is not going to stay secret. If there is one thing kids are famous for it's not keeping their mouths shut. And lets face it, she's a kid. So make the decision. Is this job a career? Or just a job? Jobs change. You put some stock in careers. what is the job anyway?

Point two is the crucial one. I say it's not worth it.

murphy_green

My thanks to all who posted. I pretty much decided that it won't be worth it, so thats' that and thanks to all

PurpleButton

I wouldn't do it. Already bad enough it's in the workplace. but she's underage. Plus, at 17 girls think they are grown, but they are NOT. Trust me, this is coming from a female that was once 17 and often takes a look back at the past and laughs at herself.

CD

bad analogy...

"look at it this way when you are 48 how old will she be?"

The problem from the get-go was that she is too young to know any better, and you can't afford to deal with an immature girl when you are in such a good work position. 6 years is no big deal, but only when both parties have reached the point where age is just a number. And she's not at that point yet.

Someone once told me about the half+7 rule... it basically says that in order to know the youngest girl you can date, divide your age by 2 and then add 7. So 23/2 + 7 = 18.5... lets say round up to 19 and there you have it.

ps the subtract 7 and multiply by 2 tells you the oldest you can see.
(23-7) * 2 = 32

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