WR - How to go about asking girl out

07-23-2007, 05:23 PM

KVargs

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How to go about asking girl out

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So here's the deal. I'm 20 years old (21 in a few months), taking a summer class at a junior college; its a 4 week course, we're halfway through it now. Anyway, the teacher is pretty cute, she's 23 years old, and seems pretty outgoing. I know its weird, but I don't really know how to ask her out or even approach her about going out. I was thinking of asking her to help me study or whatever, and then just talking, but I'm not sure if thats the best way....Should I just go after class and ask?

Thanks in advance for the help.

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07-23-2007, 05:38 PM	#2
agc bitch Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Virginia Posts: 1,274/0.93 Threads: 18 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out Just ask her-you're 20-what have you got to lose? Just my .02. Good luck!

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07-23-2007, 06:02 PM	#3
KVargs whore Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: San diego, CA Posts: 43/0.05 Threads: 1 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out True, but I mean, I feel there are some consequences that may arise. Since she's my teacher, how might this affect my grades. Say we do go out and its no good, then what? I don't know whether I should wait longer or just suck it up

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07-23-2007, 06:56 PM	#4
sapipa whore Join Date: May 2005 Location: where the beer flows like wine, where the women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano Posts: 481/0.36 Threads: 12 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out I don't know if it's this way there, but most colleges have a rule saying "Teachers cannot date students." So if you really want to date this girl, I say do this: Let her know you're interested in her now. However you do this is up to you. Flirt a bit, be direct and just tell her straight up, slip her a note, whatever. Then let her know that you don't want to jeopardize her job by dating her while she's you're teacher, but ask her if she would be willing to go get a drink when you're no longer teacher/student.

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07-23-2007, 07:03 PM	#5
*michaeljohn* Scotlands finest SuperMod Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Glasgow Scotland Heritage: Scotsman; Pict Posts: 40,348/21.29 Threads: 2938 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out you signed up nearly a year ago, giving a birth date of October, 1983. Now you say you are 20. I suspect you are younger and joined here while underage. How old are you really? Also, haven't you seen the notices I have given to post up or get banned for a spell? At least you started now, and have posts in your history. Keep it up, it is proper to post thank you replies at this board. Back on topic. 23 is young to teach at JC, but yeah, it's possible. I have friend who taught at a JC and in his 30's he met and later married a student. First thing you have to realize is, this is a professional situation. She may feel uncomfortable about dating a student, let alone meeting with one socially, even as friends. But hell, there are ways around it. Best advice is this...Arrange with a few other students in your class, male and female alike, to hook up after class on the last day for drinks, snacks, chat, etc. She will feel more comfortable going out with several folks rather than just you. Then, let the converasation you have with her suggest you would like to keep in touch. Judge her reception level to that and act accordingly. Positive, well you should know what to do....If she seems cold to that, prearrange with a lady acquaintence to be there seperately. ( A Sister or cousin works great). After she rejects you, or is cold, step aside and put the make on your "plant". Make it look like you hit a "Love Connection". That will get her interested, quick. Ok, keep posting, and fill us in later.
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07-23-2007, 07:35 PM

jobforacowboy

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Re: How to go about asking girl out

Quote:

Originally Posted by michaeljohn

you signed up nearly a year ago, giving a birth date of October, 1983. Now you say you are 20. I suspect you are younger and joined here while underage. How old are you really? Also, haven't you seen the notices I have given to post up or get banned for a spell? At least you started now, and have posts in your history. Keep it up, it is proper to post thank you replies at this board.

Back on topic. 23 is young to teach at JC, but yeah, it's possible. I have friend who taught at a JC and in his 30's he met and later married a student. First thing you have to realize is, this is a professional situation. She may feel uncomfortable about dating a student, let alone meeting with one socially, even as friends. But hell, there are ways around it.

Best advice is this...Arrange with a few other students in your class, male and female alike, to hook up after class on the last day for drinks, snacks, chat, etc. She will feel more comfortable going out with several folks rather than just you. Then, let the converasation you have with her suggest you would like to keep in touch. Judge her reception level to that and act accordingly. Positive, well you should know what to do....If she seems cold to that, prearrange with a lady acquaintence to be there seperately. ( A Sister or cousin works great). After she rejects you, or is cold, step aside and put the make on your "plant". Make it look like you hit a "Love Connection". That will get her interested, quick.

Ok, keep posting, and fill us in later.

that's some good advice.

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07-23-2007, 07:55 PM	#7
KVargs whore Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: San diego, CA Posts: 43/0.05 Threads: 1 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out Ok first off, thanks to everyone who has posted. agc - I kinda feel what you're saying, I want to just grow some balls and ask, but I fear the consequences. Sapipa - Because you mentioned this, I decided to do some research, and so far I've yet to find anything about teacher/student relationships. I'm gonna keep looking though, because I'm not trying to ruin this girls career. Luckily I've only got a few weeks left and then I guess she's fair game. MichaelJohn - Ok, truthfully, I'm 20 years old....I signed up for this site a while back, I forget why, but I was cleaning up my bookmarks today and came across the forums, found the thread here and thought I might as well get some outsider perspective on this whole situation. I'm not trying to exaggerate anything here; the teacher is 23, and I'm 20. I do understand what you're saying about it being a professional situation, that's why I'm hesitant, but at the same time, if she were to become uneasy about the whole thing, I would expect her to be professional about it too, and not let her emotions show in my grades. Now your other advice was to get a group of people together from class and have a little get together. The thing is, I don't really know anyone from the class...I'm there to raise my GPA after screwing around too much at a different school. I'm not a real outgoing person either, so it's going to take a lot for me just to go try to talk to this teacher about something other than academics. My plan was to just ask her to take some time after class and go over things she's been lecturing on, then naturally just start talking with her, and see where things go. If that went well then I would go to the next step which would be go grab some coffee or something. I appreciate the advice you guys have given me, and I'll try to keep you updated with what happens.

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07-25-2007, 09:01 PM	#8
Echolalia whore Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 188/0.21 Threads: 5 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out Don't ask her out while she is your teacher. There are rules against dating students, and even if they don't have them at your school it would be seen as unprofessional. Thus, there is a greater chance of you getting rejected, even if it isn't about you at all. Maybe at a later time try asking her out or "accidently" run into her (and ask her out) when the semester if over.

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07-25-2007, 09:01 PM	#9
Echolalia whore Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 188/0.21 Threads: 5 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out Don't ask her out while she is your teacher. There are rules against dating students, and even if they don't have them at your school it would be seen as unprofessional. Thus, there is a greater chance of you getting rejected, even if it isn't about you at all. Maybe at a later time try asking her out or "accidently" run into her (and ask her out) when the semester is over.

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08-15-2007, 03:25 PM	#10
spanx24 whore Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: San Antonio, Texas Posts: 12/0.02 Threads: 0 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out Good Luck whatever you choose :-*

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08-19-2007, 12:20 PM	#11
yammy whore Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: US Posts: 464/0.34 Threads: 5 Friends Network	Re: How to go about asking girl out I'm with MichaelJohn sober Scots perspective. Dude -- you have choices here in controlling how she's going to have to size up the situation here. One: You can ask her for help and then work you magic on getting her to like you one on one. All the teacher student crap is going to be going through her head, and that's even if she's remotely interested in you -- which is itself a reach to expect given she's your teacher and you are so low key the thought probably hasn't crossed her mind. Why not throw in an everest climb while your at it??!!?? You may as well hope to win the lottery. Or TWO: you can use the Mad Scotsman's very sober approach (that'd be MichaelJohn) which is to use the group as a cover for a chance for her to get to know you and you to get to know her, and see where it goes. That's where you gotta strap it on. Arrange the group event and use the group of students in your class to pressure her into being team player and show up. Then go from there... But you gotta be a bit of a leader in any event you throw -- making sure she's getting the groups attention at your instigation. But your own admitted low key style may not be what it takes...academic discussions might be good to seperate you from the rest of the group in a sub conversation. Fine, but you gotta let her know you're not just interested in work. You are curious about how she got to be a teacher... how she came to teach at the school, where she's from.. where she went to school... and let it flow from there. Work up the nerve knowing you have the perfect cover with your peers in the mix to do your conversation. Those are things that everyone else will probably want to know as well. Your specific interest in her academic subject might be the perfect commonality, but life is more than just about work. One place i disagree with MJ is on the backup chick, though. My opinion is lots of gals respond to persistence, as long as its not douchebag persistence or puppy dog persistence. Having backup broads tells her you're a player. Round 1 may be a no, but that' doesn't mean you have to give up -- and you're trying again will tell her this is no puppy love -- as is often the case with students falling for teachers, etc., but some dude whose confident and certain about what he wants -- so much so that a little "no" ain't gonna get in his way. Keep taking other classes, but make sure to Take MJ's advice about finding a way to keep in touch. (in fact, that should be your ONLY objective -- getting permission to keep in touch -- will give you time to work on a friendship vs. a student teacher relationship.) Luck for you is the fairly small age gap vs. the hot spunky red haired History Prof I had in college. I was maybe 20 and she was 28... I decided to do my Jr year thesis in a subject where she'd have to be an adviser. Soon enough i realized what a stupid move it was. One on one with a prof on a subject about which i had no clue and little to discuss. She's a pro teacher and looking at me like -- WTF is this kid doing? I wish someone back then Like Dr. Scotsman MichaelJohn were there to sober me up and have taken an approach like his.

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