had20z

click on one of our sponsors! OR REMOVE ADS

Intro…

3 weeks ago, my girl friend of 6 1/2 years decided that we were done, the next day she goes out and hooks up with this guy. And whatever….

Right now im going threw a hard time in my life, my father has cancer and he has taken a turn for the worse in the past month….

………………..


Ok, I met this chick 2 weeks ago, we made an instant bond b/c she just got out of an relationship and she is also going threw some pretty hard stuff right now…we can talk open to each other about anything…I told all my friends that I wasn’t going to fall for her because I did not want to ruin our straight up awesome friendship…

Last Friday, me and her went shopping, out to eat and than went mudding in my truck…heh…we had an awesome day… so I dropped her off at work that night and we went our separate ways. Saturday night, comes around I went to a club with some friends and she is all I could think of, I knew that I was starting to have more than just friend feelings for her…

We both told each other that, what we have is going to be based on the truth, and the truth alone. So that night I call her and tell her that I know me and her both are very vulnerable and going threw some pretty crazy shit and I know that this is going to change everything, but im starting to have more than just “friend feelings” about you…she got quite and than was like…ill call you back…by this I did not mean, I want to go out with you and marry you and have kids with you...just me being honest…

So an hour goes by and she calls me back and is like, “I care about you very deeply as a good friend and a great guy, but I can’t have feelings like that for anyone right now”

The next day, we were talking and she said she talked to her roommate, and her friend thinks we should quit talking all together. I asked her what she thought, and she said...no but I think we should talk less…

Well today she went on vacation with her mother and will be gone for a week. Before she left I told her when she gets back we should go mudding and have some fun again. And she said she couldn’t wait….

All my friends that have known her for a while think I need to keep pushing the issue but at a slower rate, and let our life’s die down a little bit and then try and start something more


Question # 1 -Opinions? Thoughts?
Question # 2 –Is she trying to push me away, from being scared of being hurt again?
Question # 3 –Should I keep pushing the issue, but at a slower rate…
Question #4 –What in the hell should I do?


Please give me some info,

Mike

zepp21

Personally I would give it time. I think you have something genuine going on but become friends first...lovers later. Maybe try a semi-romantic date, maybe dinner and a movie..better yet make her dinner and watch a movie together. Get some quality talk time in with her and express yourself without pushing your opinion. Since she got out of a relationship she may want to have some time out of one so just give it time.

tsmo

decent response. Id give her the time she needs. You'll hopefully not end up in the friend zone forever - but pushing things along may get you no where fast. definitly keep up on the quality time...

...and.. if need be, cut things off for a bit and see how she reacts. as in.. just find something else to do without her.. doesnt mean breaks dates or anything.. just.. dont be around. and see how she reacts to it.

good luck. tough position to be in.. and as a guy.. its typical to want to jump right in to another relationship - teh sex rules your brain.

and g/l with your ol man. Cancer is a tough bitch.

___________________________________________
I'm a terminal non-achiever

Te2ting

yea i agree with the rest.......it would be best if you just give it some time and wait for somethings to clear out of both your lives before jumping into another relationship and in the meanwhile cherish your friendship with her because in my opinion the best relationships start off as friendships.......and you never know maybe she will realize that she has strong feelings for you too.well good luck man

jShizz

Utilize her as a friend right now, that's what you need to get you through this hard time. If it develops into something later, great. If it doesn't, it wasn't meant to be and you leave it at having a great friend that got you through a rough patch.

fmb

good advice from everyone above. don't chase her, she's told you she ain't into that right now. having said that, let her know you're close by (just not at her beck and call). do your own thing; at times, include her in it. remember, she should have to work for you also. if it works, great. if not, at least you'll have a great friend to hang out with.