EffinPirate112

click on one of our sponsors! OR REMOVE ADS

Alright. I'm 20 years old, and have really wondered the following: My last girlfriend was November of 2005 (we broke up then), and I have been single ever since. I also work full-time at Six Flags. I don't think I'm that bad looking. My pictures are on http://www.myspace.com/jewdo . My longest relationship was 1 month, and I broke up with her because I was very busy with high school. (at the time, but I'm done with high school now)

Is it normal to be single this long, or is there a way to improve on getting into a relationship?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated, heh.

Wilken

Here's the thing - I'm not going to your myspace page, but I'll take your word for it. Just enjoy being single and don't sweat it.

I've been single pretty much forever, with extended "relationships" coming and going, (generally girls that I've hooked up with more than once or twice) - and I gotta tell ya, it's fantastic. Nobody to tell you you can't go out with the boys, nobody to buy extra birthday/anniversary/valentines/xmas/just because gifts for.....but then again I'm fiercely independent, and really selfish at this point in my life.

The key is just to keep on L-I-V-I-N, like Wooderson in Dazed and Confused...the more deperate and clingy you are to girls you meet, the more they're going to be driven away. The reason I know this is because I really DON'T want a relationship, tell them so, and that makes them chase me even more. Which would be great....but I don't want a relationship!!!

Relax, don't worry, have a homebrew!

siopawman

normal and abnormal are subjective words. just enjoy your being single. if you're happy with it, stay with it. but if you're longing for someone to be with, then you need to do something.

basically, don't let others influence your feelings and emotions, you yourself can gauge what you want, what would make you happy.

Weezer1982

Of course its normal, but everyone is different. Just be happy with yourself first of all, then find happiness in a girlfriend if you feel the need. Whatever floats your boat.

MasterQ

So basically you've been single a little over a year. Don't sweat it bro. Though it sounds very hard to hear you'll soon realize the truth behind these words.

"Girls"/woman are a lot of work. The best thing you could do right now is get settled with where your heading. Woman usually get in the way because they need/deserve so much of your time. If sex is on your mind that can be easily fixed if relationship is on your mind get a dog!

You will be surprised how much loving yourself and doing everything YOU want to do will raise personal confidence and possible open up what career you really want to do beyond Six Flags.

Start saving as much money as you can! Take this opportunity so many of us married men realize much much later. Noone says you can't have friends who are girls and that is probably your best bet. Don't put the pressure on yourself at this point in your life. Just because a woman is cute, attractive and your groin is starting to ache with maybe your heart doesn't mean you need to fuck it all up with a relationship.

You are the captain of your boat now so explore the waters with leisure

You'll be surprised who finally shows up when least expected. I realize how cliche' this sounds but man is it so true.

I had just about given up on women when I finally just realized I needed to make some promises to myself and keep them. Get my life situated where a woman would be more than a welcome addition instead of just filling a lonely void and then BAM there she popped into my life.

It can't be even more simpler than that! Just remember we all want most that which we can't have right away and that leads to many desperate decisions you'll soon regret for the rest of your damn life. You said you had a girlfriend so that already answers that it will not be impossible for that to happen again (lord knows dont try and track her down again....that could be serious trouble haha)

Ok just my 2 cents anyway...Good Luck bro!

jeffc574

Relax. Meet people. You are fine. Try talking to girls who are friends or with whom you share an interest. I don't think you have anything to worry about.

yammy

Just be, man. No worries.

I've found the happiest relationships are among those folks who are busy living their lives rather than worrying about not having someone to share it with. Take this time to learn who you are and what you enjoy. Don't be one of the countless who put that off until they find someone / get wayyy involved or married, and then discover they like exactly what the other person isn't in to.

Also, I'm a big fan of avoiding the crowds doing the same old singles scene. If you're into, say, mountain biking, you're best off spending your weekends doing that vs. hanging out and cruising bars, etc. where the only thing you have in common with others is you're single and at a bar. Better off to join the local mountain biking club to network that way.

Of course, substitute you're own interests. And when you're in your early 20s and single, man, that is the time to check shit out -- seriously. No obligations other than figuring out what you really enjoy? Sample, sample, sample! While you're doing that you're odds are dramatically higher you'll stumble on some F whose digging the same exploration, and you're on your way to meeting some really cool folks. Beats being a run of the mill bump on a log.

Also, JeffC above makes a great point -- make sure you're having friends who are girls. So many guys only have girlfriends who change, and then their constant long term guy buddies. If they're not dating girls, there's no girls in their lives. Of course, that's not always the case, but the older you get it becomes unhealthy perspective wise. F's have lots of wisdom that'll help in the long run!

fmb

Great advice from those above, especially yammy. I could never have said those words any better, in any manner. Get out there, have fun, and enjoy yourself. It's better to find someone who fits into your life than trying to fit your life into someone else. If the both of you have common interests, the future is definitely better than if you would have nothing in common. Loosen up, chill out, and have a cold one.