skater_dude

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Ok.. so heres the deal.. my girlfriend and I have been going out comin on 6 months.. and we were both virgins. weve had sex 3 times pretty recently. and shes told me that shes never really had an orgasm yet. but she still likes that we do it. ive been able to give her orgasms by clitoral stimulation but not vaginal.. any ideas how to help? im pretty sure that if i tried positions which required her back to me that she wont like it cause she likes to kiss.. =) lol and ive also got one other problem... like i said weve had sex 3 times but.. i still havent cum yet... why is that? i mean shit, she turns me on i know that but could it be the condom i use? or what...? well sry it was kinda long. THANKS!

CD

Condoms desensitize me to the point of I may not cum unless she's experienced (thanks Jamie) or I take it off (thanks Amanda). The best thing to do if condoms are a must would be to get the thinnest, most sensitive ones you can find. It may still not be enough, cause your gf is very new to this and doesn't know how to work her vaginal muscles yet. That comes with time, but the best thing would be you inside her completely and don't move. Let her try to tighten the muscles and when she's good at that, you can then go back to the old "in out, in out."

As to make her cum without clitoral, why not use your fingers while in missionary? Better yet, have her do that and pay attention to when she wants you to move and when to stay still.

Best of luck.

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Esco

SD ... most importantly, make sure you both are relaxed and not focusing so much on climaxing. I've found for most women it's simply a matter of a mental block and that once some trust is established, the "issue" of her climaxing will resolve itself.

Girl on top always works well as it allows her to grind her clit on your pubic bone. Angle yourself up for maximum pelvis contact and allow her to grind away.

yammy

For her:

An orgasm is much better / easier achieved by focusing on the whole body, the semi erogenous zones (breast, nipple, back of neck, around the pubic area). Don't just zone in on the clit. It's even better with some teasing foreplay. When its time to touch the clit zone, don't just dig in. tease it and go back to what you were doing. slowly build up and then back off again, building slowly until you notice she can't stand waiting. Then keep it up until she's really wet.

The O for F's is also about mostly about trust and feeling safe enough to let go, so taking your time allows her to slowly find the buzz and let it build until she knows she must let go.

Also, when you're on top, lean forward so that the top of your pecker rubs up and down on the clit area as it goes in and out. In other words, your kinda going in and out with an ass up and down motion, but you're leaning upwards as if you're always trying to kiss her... That upward pressure is kinda a hump and grind while fucking. Every gal i've known digs that a ton.

As for that, lean up and lightly lick and suck on her nipples while having sex. Even before a light finger around the nipple and up to the shoulder away to tease is usually liked. Always watch her breathing -- as it builds, you're doing it right, and focus more on the nipple As she gets into that,she'll ask for more.

OH! AND MAKE SURE YOU BOTH AGREE IN ADVANCE TO TALK DURING SEX, AND TELL THE OTHER WHAT REALLY FEELS GOOD. SEX CAN BE AWKWARD SIMPLY BECAUSE BOTH SIDES ARE TOO EMBARRASSED TO TALK. Make sure she knows you're totally turned on by getting her off in whatever way that turns you on. So many women at first are very self conscious about their bodies, especially their pussies and buttholes -- always tell her they turn you on if they do.

Also if she's up for it, with a wet finger reach under and around and ring it lightly around her pussy and her tain't (tain't her anus, tain't her pussy) and eventually her butthole. Don't go too aggressively at the butthole, though, and always back off a bit and away onto her leg to tease.

As for your own orgasm, no biggie. Not cumming fast is actually a good thing she'll love, so its a better place to start from than dropping your load seconds after entry.

focus on getting her off in ways that turn you own. that' usually allows you to forget about your cumming or not. If you don't come when she does the first time, change positions -- from behind or with her on top. Focus on getting her off and eventually you'll find yourself in sync.

Also, someone said have her hold your dick with her pussy. that's a great way to get things going, as well as build her sex muscles and both of your understanding of what feels good. Just lie on top of her and have her hold you in -- very slowly. Make it a game -- can she keep you in or out? Even just lying there syncing breathing can be very erotic.

also, I always like to give it from behind when I'm wanting to cum. something about looking down on her ass from behind is really a turn on.

Everyone's different, but sometimes a change from mouth to pussy to mouth and back can make an orgasm really come together. Guys are visual too, so a 69 lead off where you're both on eachother can be the perfect set up for a mind-blowing fuck orgasm. I always cum much faster in a 69 bj than straight up and don't last long at all if we shift to a fuck before cumming.

Hope all that helps. Let us know if any suggestions work! And PLAY SAFELY!

skater_dude

Thanks guys for the info it really helps!

Queso

also, some girls just don't reach orgasm through penetration. i've yet to get off on anything but oral

TJones

To make yourself more sensitive while wearing a condom, put some (water based) lube inside the tip of the condom prior to putting it on. That significantly reduces the disconnected feeling that condoms can give.

Also...doing her from behind does NOT prevent kissing. In fact, my GF and I really like that position because we can still kiss, etc. I can kiss the back of her neck...she can turn her head and we can frenchie-frenchie...etc. "From behind" is much more than the traditionally thought of doggie style (her on the hands and knees while you pokey-pokey from a distance)...try lying down on your sides (spooning...which allows some nice 'hugging,' kissing and breast or clitoris fondling...not to mention that the geometry of such a position usually gives extra stimulation to her G-spot). Or, try her completely flat on her stomach with you on top (sort of 'vertical' spooning). When it gets hot and heavy, you can pull her up into a traditional doggie move...when you are both done, you can roll over into the aforementioned spoon to cuddle and kiss some more. Good stuff.