Caspar

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This is a story about a couple of blondes (im norwegian, of they are blonde!) and a hopefully-not-asshole aka me. the pizzaface part in the title is there solely to get ur attention. and for the wordplay, ofc. bit of a long read, and i left out lots of stuff...

So, I had a 5 year sexbuddy relationship with this chick. I told her from the start (before we had sex even) taht i werent intrested in anything else than just sex. A couple of times we argued cus i accused her of having feelings for me (also, before we had sex) but she denied, and after the second one we had sex. After, she tells me i just took her virginity. (she didnt bleed, lost the whatever its called (english = second language) when riding a horse at 15, so i didnt really notice, cept taht she was kinda lousy..) anyways... i got kinda mad, because i consider that a lot bigger of a deal than just sex, i mean, she will remember me her whole life...

time goes by and i accuse her of feelings a couple of more times, then one day, AFTER we have sex she goes: we have to talk....
as feared, its the 'i have feelings for you'-etc talk, and we decided to end it. thats fine. cept that she misunderstands a couple of things i said and thinks i told her (how she got this out of waht i actuually said is beyond me!) that i
1) never wanna see her again
2) was her friend ONLY because of sex (not true, like 80% of the time we were partying together then ended up in bed after. she was a blast to hang out with )

what then happens is that her friend makes a scene, accusing me of all this shit when we're out one day, other friends of her get mixed in, all goes shit, but ends well. she and another friend of her ended up at my place and we talked all night and we cleared up everything. only problem? that friend, she's hot...

so, when my 5-month former fuckbuddy leaves for home (she studies in my town) i still hang out with her friends, and we have a blast. what happens, of course, is taht i make out with her hot friend.
not 5 days after she leaves, i think... 2 days after that, we have sex. this was like 2 months ago and we still have sex. but i dont think taht alone makes me an asshole, im really like this girl and she likes me back, we might actually take this somewhere. My former FB doesnt know any of this. i feel kinda bad about all of this, but.... sex.

so the questions are:
does this make me an asshole?
should i tell my ex-fb?
should i let her friend, who i am fornicating regularly, tell it, in such a way that portraits me as the bad guy so they can remain friends as im pretty much boned however this goes down?

discuss!

oh, and on a side note, i had 3 other girls that noone knows about during this period of time. one i had from before i met the 5month FB, (we hooked up like 2 times a month for a year or so) and the 2 other were random one-nighters. as noone know this you may or may not take this side note into consideration. depends on how u think, i guess...

be gentle, im a very fragile little boy.

CD

You don't seem to be very fragile. Anyway, I don't think you're an asshole as long as you tell the girls up front that it isn't about a relationship. I honestly don't know who you should tell or even how to do it, but hopefully someone else can pop up in here and let you know.

___________________________________________

SideshowBob

sounds to me like you've been pretty up front with your FB. Therefore, as a FB, the other hookups do not matter at all because you were EXPLICITLY NOT COMMITTED to this FB. Unfortunately, you might end up with a reputation as an asshole because your FB couldn't help herself and heard what she wanted to (or what she feared most from the sound of it) from the "I have feelings for you" chat. If she talks to people you know, then you will sound like the bad guy.

To answer your questions:
1. You are not being an asshole. If your FB was a girlfriend, different story.
2. You only need to tell your ex-FB if you ever intend to hang out in the same room with her again. It might suck, but she is going to find out one way or another.
3. If you let the friend tell her, you might drive them apart too. You should probably tell the exFB.

Finally....if you hope to have any real future with the hot friend, you better tell her everything to this point. (Except the 3 hookups, they don't count.) If she is just a new FB, then it doesn't matter. Good luck!

Caspar

Thanks for the input guys...

My new fb, lets call her taht, knows about the 3 girls, i told her about everything up front, and when i slept with someone else after starting the 'relationship' with her, i told her about it at once. She's fine with it. cept for the fact that i used to fk her friend and that her friends wouldnt approve one second (and that i, eh, kissed her other friend) the only thing that keeps us from not happening is the fact that we're both moving 400 miles in opposite directions....

oh well thnx, please post more opinions if u diffrer from the ones who replied

Caspar

oh, and im not very fragile, and u noticed ofc. Smart people for the win