I'm sure this question has been posted here before, but thought i would revisit this topic.
I would love to try anal sex w/ my wife. she loves it when her ass is teased by a probing fingering and that gets her horny as hell, but anytime I hint around at trying it and rub my cock against her asshole, she tells me not to even think about it because 'it's too big and it's going to hurt'....
is there any way to convince her otherwise that it's not going to hurt? I've toyed w/ the idea of getting her a toy and so she can get used to the feeling and relaxing her anal muscles some, but I'm looking for suggestions...
Here's a couple of things to keep in mind: Missionary style is one of the harder ways to penetrate the ass. Doggie style is also usually too tight to get it in at the beginning. The best way for first timers is cowgirl on top, so she can sit down on to your dick at her own pace - and don't thrust much at first. Use a lot of lunbe and do your finger play and rimming before your dick comes into it. Get her REALLY excited and refuse to put it in her pussy. It's a game, but it's not hurtful or manipulative; she's missing out on an INCREDIBLE and erotic experience. And remind her to look forward to the AMAZING anal orgasm she'll have. Slim butt plugs, a little wider then your finger at first, will help her slowly accept a larger diameter.
Also, offer to let her penetrate you in the same way you are asking her. She may turn you down because anal is not her fantasy, it's yours. But the offer is important. Anal sex is partially psychological. Once they get over the inhibition and the initial pain of not knowing how to accept something into their ass, they will desire it and will work to get your dick into their asshole when it's tight- even if their experienced at anal sex, sometimes the asshole has a 'tight' day.
gen cutter has some good pointers. Here are a few from me:
1) get her very excited, possibly close to orgasm. When she's close to orgasm, the pain isn't as noticeable. Try this by not just using one, but two or even three well lubricated fingers in her.
2) Go slow with this. It's going to take awhile before she's okay with it. Time is on your side.
3) When you're downtown on her, slip some fingers in her ass while you're orally pleasuring her. Make this all about her.
4) After trying all these things and she's begging for mercy, use your penis to tease her ass. Let her know you're not going to penetrate her. Tease her. Let her get used to the great feelings and the feeling of your penis being at her entry.
thanks for the various comments on how to get her into this, because I need all the help I can get.
this past weekend, when we were fucking, she was sitting on me facing away from me, her ass was so lubricated that while I was fucking her, I was also finger fucking her ass.....she appears to absolutely love it becuase she was constantly pushing her ass back on my finger, but she just has this fear that a cock in her ass will hurt.... and it's not like I'm hung, just average size I'm sure.... I was slowly teasing her at different times by pushing my cock against her ass and fucking her with her vibrator, thinking it would get her in the mood and she gets horny as hell doing that, so I think I just need to be patient with her and take your words of advice...