Hi i'm a 22 years old and i am really concerned for my 19 year old brother. He has extremely low self esteem for somone of his age group. I am worrying if it is effecting his social and work life. I am quite sure that has to do with his body image. He is constantly telling me that he is incredibly ugly. I don't know what to say to him because i personally don't think hes naturally ugly but he is pretty much convinced he is hideous. Based purely on looks, would you say he is ugly?? I'm not going to tell him this as I am currently looking for ways to help him. I just want to define the problem is.
the place that you uploaded the pics is banned here, so we can't see them. I'm not sure what to tell you other then to keep telling him that he is full of shit. maybe a new hair style that better suits him. maybe he needs some counciling or maybe he needs a girl to tell him and mean it.
I don't see how posting pictures of him on the internet would have helped him much. Did he know about that?
Just try to keep the self esteem up by being nice to him (I know, how vague) and try introducing him to friends, especially girls. Maybe if he feels like a lot of people like him it will help.
It could just be a phase/something he does though. I know people who say that about themselves all the time and they either don't really mean it (just want compliments, but women tend to do that more), or they are just used to saying it.
You know what worked for me? New wardrobe, and traveling.
When I was 15 I was really ugly, I thought. My sister convinced my mother to give me $300 for new clothes of a style that was my choice. But laid ground rules about no sports teams, sweat pants, pajama bottoms, stuff like that. We shopped from 10AM-9PM and finally got myself a brand new wardrobe for my trip down to Florida, where and when I got my first kiss.
Than at 17 and 21 I went through another stage. I couldn't attract a woman to save my life, but knew I was attractive. So at 17 I went to a conference for a week in Washington DC. 50 guys and 250 girls. I was rated in a slambook as #4 hottest guy. That really soared my confidence. And at 21 I went to Florida and worked for Disney world in their College Program (they also have a career start program for kids graduating high school) and I met so many great people, went to so many great clubs and made out with a different girl seemingly bi-weekly.....by hardly trying lol.
Seriously if you send me pics of him and his style I can give you some "preppy boy" tips on how he can dress (as this is my style). I also worked for AE for a year and got to love fashion. (an aside, best freakin job ever. Girls would look in mirrors and ask me if their ass was fat....and I'd always say "yes, pretty hott and temptin'" only got one complaint and 8 phone numbers....sexy plexi)
Otherwise just try to hook him up, or talk to him. Ask him why he feels the way he does. He's obviously in-tune with his emotions if he'll talk to you about them.