Flip the Wish

[jShizz]

why? Because it's Saturday and I have nothing better to do.

Here's how this works. I'll make a wish. The next poster will grant it, but with a catch or misinterpretation that makes the wish horrible and then make their own wish. For example:

Person 1: "I wish I had a pet turkey."
Person 2: "Granted. But it is a gay turkey and when you kill it and eat it for Thanksgiving, everyone at the table suddenly insists you turn Cher on the stereo. I wish....."
Person 3: "Granted, but..."

Etc.

I'll go first. I wish I had red hair.

[CD]

Granted, but your red hair then proceeds to take away all of your pigmentation, leaving you almost as pale as Michael Jackson, while a tremendous number of freckles pop up ALL OVER your new pasty body.

I wish I could fly...

[jShizz]

Granted, but your name is valcor and you have gay sex with Bastian

http://www.simpleviews.net/images/May2006/neverEnding.jpg

I wish coffee didn't make me poop

[Lazer]

Granted but, You will now piss coffee unstead of uriine.

I wish this thread would die!

[PMBalls]

Granted, but it will be brought back in two years by a noob's 12th post

I wish I was a little bit taller

[Waffle]

granted, but you wont be a baller or have a girl that looks good or call her

i wish i was as cool as batman

:josher:

[jShizz]

granted, but your night vision only allows you to see your parents having sex

I wish I could have an unlimited supply of bologna

[CD]

granted, but you wont be a baller or have a girl that looks good or call her

i wish i was as cool as batman

:josher:
Granted, but now you must butt fuck Robin just like Batman has done for years.

I wish tonights Halloween parties are amazing.

[SideshowBob]

granted, but your night vision only allows you to see your parents having sex

I wish I could have an unlimited supply of bologna

Granted, but you will forever be out of bread and condiments. You must eat it by itself.

I wish every day was Christmas.

[jShizz]

Granted, but you will forever be out of bread and condiments. You must eat it by itself.

I wish every day was Christmas.

Granted, but your nuts are replaced by two glass ornaments. If you break them, you die.

I wish I had a big screen TV

[Waffle]

granted but it only plays carrot top at full volume and you cant turn it off or mute it

i wish mooses were tamed and replaced bikes as a means of short distance transportation

:josher:

[michaeljohn]

Granted

I wish :juan: would archive this :whore: chainletter thread so I don't have to.

[koЯnut]

Granted

I wish :juan: would archive this :whore: chainletter thread so I don't have to.



Granted. But you will still be the bitter old man mod that likes to kill creative and fun threads in the BOTH for weird reasons.


I wish I had a never ending glass of beer in front of me.

[tboltman]

Granted

I wish :juan: would archive this :whore: chainletter thread so I don't have to.

Granted,

but then every thread in BOTH turns into a rant chainletter.

I wish Sophie Moon was sitting in my lap naked.............

[kulotsalot]

Granted,

but then every thread in BOTH turns into a rant chainletter.

I wish Sophie Moon was sitting in my lap naked.............

Granted, but she sharts on you (the really wet, stinky, splattery kind).

I wish we had more sun.

[jShizz]

Granted, but she sharts on you (the really wet, stinky, splattery kind).

I wish we had more sun.

Granted, but you change your name to George Hamilton and are forced to do cheez it commercials because the sun has made you look like this

http://images.usatoday.com/life/gallery/tan/zhamilton.jpg

I wish I had a margarita in my hand

[CD]

Granted, but you change your name to George Hamilton and are forced to do cheez it commercials because the sun has made you look like this

http://images.usatoday.com/life/gallery/tan/zhamilton.jpg

I wish I had a margarita in my hand
Granted, but Margarita is a 400 pound fat Italian man dressed up in drag. Oh yeah, you have him by the nuts.

I wish Spiderman 3 is as awesome as I hope it will be.

[Lucky13]

Granted, but Margarita is a 400 pound fat Italian man dressed up in drag. Oh yeah, you have him by the nuts.

I wish Spiderman 3 is as awesome as I hope it will be.

Granted, but it will only be released as a double feature with "Hulk 2"

I wish I had an awesome sports car.

[licupssy]

Granted. But you will still be the bitter old man mod that likes to kill creative and fun threads in the BOTH for weird reasons.


I wish I had a never ending glass of beer in front of me.

Granted but you have to drink it with a straw and your dick shortens up to 1/2 inch so you have to pee sitting down!

I wish I was a millionaire!

[procol]

Granted but you have to drink it with a straw and your dick shortens up to 1/2 inch so you have to pee sitting down!

I wish I was a millionaire!

Granted, but it will last for 6 seconds as you will have to give it to your fellow Webrats.

I have no wish.

[licupssy]

Granted, but it will last for 6 seconds as you will have to give it to your fellow Webrats.

I have no wish.

Granted but since I'm poor again you'll have to grant Lucky 13's wish to have a awesome sports car!

I wish I was an IRS agent so I could afford the taxes I owe from being a millionaire!

[SMonty30]

granted, but.... urrr, umm, something happens that involves the us govt, a dildo, sum coffee, and a piece of cake.... that is really really bad, yeah take that!!!

i wish i had sum wishes :D

[ClockworkApple]

Granted, but those wishes can only be used to gain a wish that has some ridiculous negative outcome <_<

I wish my job involved topless women somehow...

[SMonty30]

congrats your working with your mother *shudders and vomits*

i wish booty would stop lurking in this thread

[BackdoorJesus]

granted, but only because Booty will now post whore in it rather than lurk.

I wish I ruled the world

[tsmo]

granted. the world however has changed as you knew it,. and has become a vast barren land full of Zombies.

I wish I had a few ounces of sticky buds to smoke

[Jackie-0]

Granted, but the buds are that fake "legal high" shit they sell online that only makes you cough and your lungs ache. Not that I know anything about that...

I wish I was 20 pounds lighter.

[BackdoorJesus]

granted but it's because you have a leg amputated.

I wish there was worldwide peace.

[tsmo]

granted,. only it comes in the form of a few mushroom clouds.

I wish animals could talk

[Jabooty_3]

granted, but they only speak goodwork's innapropriate words from Japan

I wish something would turn out right for once

[tsmo]

granted, you get a date. shes totally hot, pays for everything so you dont have to, then sucks you off twice. You finally reach down to get some stinky finger, and grab a handful of cock n balls. mortified you grab her hair and pull off her wig to discover its Graffin pulling a fast one on you. - and its all recorded and posted on Youtube and WR. :)


I wish money grew on trees.

[dive]

Grant, The thing is though that the trees grow on a desolate , cold, wet island gaurded by gay cannibals

I wish coca-cola didn't come in so many flavors

[Jabooty_3]

granted, they return to having only one flavor, but that flavor is shit

I wish I had a halloween party to attend

[licupssy]

granted, they return to having only one flavor, but that flavor is shit

I wish I had a halloween party to attend

Granted but when you get there you find yourself in a gay bar full of Druids who hace gather for the halloween sacrifice of the virgin and your asked to bend over!

I wish booty get a date with a real girl...

[Bipolar]

Granted, they make real dolls, they come made to order. But his is still considered a virgin. (am drunk dont care)

Wish I could just keel over dead and face nothing.

[Bipolar]

i quit

[BackdoorJesus]

BP you're depressed & we will catch you on a better day my friend. It's all good my brutha. :)

Granted but when you get there you find yourself in a gay bar full of Druids who hace gather for the halloween sacrifice of the virgin and your asked to bend over!

I wish booty get a date with a real girl...granted, but everything goes awesomely with her, they get married, and Booty, being Booty, is
completely faithful and dies without knowing the pleasures of many many women - his wife however
is not completely faithful and enjoys the company of many, many men before Booty's untimely demise
(at her hand, though it's never investigated by local authorities and she gets away with it).

I wish I had the power to transcend time and space

[procol]

I wish I had the power to transcend time and space

Granted, but you will find it's too important to be in any other time than the present.

I wish the desire for Casey Scam passes would stop.

[maggiesdragons]

Granted, but you will find it's too important to be in any other time than the present.

I wish the desire for Casey Scam passes would stop.

Done, but now everyone starts asking for the bootycam and maggiecam Passwords.

I wish I didn't see graffins hairy ass.

[joerockhead]

Done, but now everyone starts asking for the bootycam and maggiecam Passwords.

I wish I didn't see graffins hairy ass.


Granted - You are now blind, and since Graffin is right there, you feel his hairy ass (and smile)

I wish that it I could spell

[jShizz]

Granted - You are now blind, and since Graffin is right there, you feel his hairy ass (and smile)

I wish that it I could spell

Granted, but the only thing you can spell is the word Supercalifragi- listicexpialidocious

I wish I didn't have to wash my car today

[Jabooty_3]

granted, you see it's going to rain and think you don't have to do it, but it's acid rain and the only thing it does is melt your car

I wish I could skate backwards

[Jabooty_3]

Done, but now everyone starts asking for the bootycam and maggiecam Passwords.


pretty sure nobody wants to see bootycam :dunno:

[licupssy]

granted, you see it's going to rain and think you don't have to do it, but it's acid rain and the only thing it does is melt your car

I wish I could skate backwards

Granted but you can't turn your head and only skate downhill!

I wish I had a watermelon.

[jShizz]

Granted but you can't turn your head and only skate downhill!

I wish I had a watermelon.

Granted, but your name is now Jermaine, and you can only eat it with fried chicken and grape soda.

I wish I had money for a new tattoo.

[joerockhead]

Granted, but your name is now Jermaine, and you can only eat it with fried chicken and grape soda.

I wish I had money for a new tattoo.


You find the money, but the artist actually gives you a tat of dick on your forehead.


I wish it would snow two feet deep today

[jShizz]

You find the money, but the artist actually gives you a tat of dick on your forehead.


I wish it would snow two feet deep today

Granted, but it's yellow snow and you must eat it to stay alive

I wish I had my own smiley

[SMonty30]

granted, but its the one juan was given, and he ends up banning you for stealing it

i wish i was less tired

[jShizz]

granted, but its the one juan was given, and he ends up banning you for stealing it

i wish i was less tired

Granted, but you sleep 23 hours a day and the only thing you do during the hour your away is poop.

I wish I had a bigger TV

[yellowfish]

granted but its stuck on the brady bunch

i wish i could find a better scource for weed

[jShizz]

granted but its stuck on the brady bunch

i wish i could find a better scource for weed

Granted, but it's me and I ALWAYS pinch the sac

I wish it was lunchtime

[xevious]

granted, but you have to eat fish guts and moldy bread. I wish I was tattooing right now.

[yellowfish]

granted but you are tattoing the anus of a 90 year old lady

i wish i had 24\7 nookie

[xevious]

granted, but its from a 2 foot, 72 year old crackwhore with ragged teeth, and ghonnesyphilherpeAIDS

[yellowfish]

granted, but its from a 2 foot, 72 year old crackwhore with ragged teeth, and ghonnesyphilherpeAIDS


my my
and what wish would you want

[xevious]

I wish I had money to do laundry so I dont have to tell my mom I'm broke.

[yellowfish]

I wish I had money to do laundry so I dont have to tell my mom I'm broke.
granted but some crack whore has broken the machine so ur fucked anyways :)

i wish my boss would evaporate

[Graffin]

granted but some crack whore has broken the machine so ur fucked anyways :)

i wish my boss would evaporate


Granted, but now you're stuck doing his job AND yours.


I wish I had done my homework...

[Agitator7834]

granted, but now that its done you turned on the TV thats stuck on one channel playing a marathon of Golden Girls.

I wish the Mets had won the World Series.

[SMonty30]

granted, the world series of chess :)

i wish i had more money then graffin >_>

[Graffin]

granted, the world series of chess :)

i wish i had more money then graffin >_>


Granted, here's your twelve dollars.


I wish I had TWO pugs!

[maggiesdragons]

granted, the world series of chess :)

i wish i had more money then graffin >_>

Granted, But what you didn't know is that he is also broke, and now you have $1 more then he does.

I wish had video of last nights party




Edit, you may have two pugs, you now have Wenston teh puke eating pug!

[jShizz]

Granted, But what you didn't know is that he is also broke, and now you have $1 more then he does.

I wish had video of last nights party






Edit, you may have two pugs, you now have Wenston teh puke eating pug!

Granted, but the only footage that taped is that of you doing an upper decker in the bathroom

I wish my stomach didn't hurt

[SMonty30]

granted, now your head hurts 100 times worse

i wish i had sum food right now

[licupssy]

granted, now your head hurts 100 times worse

i wish i had sum food right now

Granted but it's strawberries in milk and you're allergic to strawberries and lactose intolerant!

I wish I wide screen TV...

[SMonty30]

granted, but it dont work

i wish i could take maggie out for a date :D

[jShizz]

granted, but it dont work

i wish i could take maggie out for a date :D

Granted, but she has the flu and vomits on you during dinner

I wish I could dress like a ho for Halloween

[BackdoorJesus]

granted but you have to wear your outfit to the Dead Man's Party gig at Cane's Bar & Grill in Mission
Beach where you will be subjected to the gawking stares and manhandling of all the college
geeks & punks that will be at the show...

I wish I could get into a new house before the end of the year

[jShizz]

granted but you have to wear your outfit to the Dead Man's Party gig at Cane's Bar & Grill in Mission
Beach where you will be subjected to the gawking stares and manhandling of all the college
geeks & punks that will be at the show...

I wish I could get into a new house before the end of the year

Granted, but it comes with a roomate who never brushes his teeth, lives off natty ice and only flushes the toilet once a week to save on his half of the water bill.

I wish I could have my house to myself right now

[SMonty30]

granted, but im there with a vid camera focussed on you, and you cant help but play up to it :)

i wish i was famous

[BackdoorJesus]

granted, but your fame is due to your working the glory hole for an unprecedented
72 hours straight...homos worldwide are clamoring to be in your fan club.

I wish I had enough money to just check out & move to Borneo, living out the remainder
of my life in hedonistic splendor

[joerockhead]

Granted, but the Natives see you as the Evil God they hate, and you are beaten and tortured every day for the rest of your life!!


I wish I could win the Lotto

[CD]

Granted but the lotto you are referring to is that weird lotto in the short movie where the winner is stoned to death.

I wish Tony Jaa would put out a ton of movies a year so I could watch the awesomeness that is Muay Thai kickboxing.

[clt_capt]

Granted - Now you get disability for losing your legs....

I wish the sky was blue

[Juan.Camaney]

Granted but now your mom is a whore.

I wish my cock didn't have all these bumps and sores on it.

[jShizz]

Granted but now your mom is a whore.

I wish my cock didn't have all these bumps and sores on it.

Granted, but instead your asshole does.

I wish I wasn't addicted to this forum

[Juan.Camaney]

granted but now you are addicted to my sore filled anus

I wish I hadn't had sex with that alligator that gave me the sores.

[jShizz]

granted but now you are addicted to my sore filled anus

I wish I hadn't had sex with that alligator that gave me the sores.

Granted, but instead you have sex with Steve Irwin's corpse

I wish I had a banana split

[Jabooty_3]

granted, but made from the bananas pictured in the other thread

I wish Juan hadn't violated Vivix's pet

[Juan.Camaney]

Granted but instead of chocolate syrup, I just pee on it a little.


Wish I hadn't drank so much this weekend.

[Queso]

Granted but instead of chocolate syrup, I just pee on it a little.
granted, but now you know you slept with the ugly bitch sober and knowingly


I wish that i could think of a wish

[clt_capt]

I wish that i could think of a wish

Granted - You wish you had big bewbies

I wish USC had a good football team

[Jabooty_3]

granted, but they thought you said futebol, so they're good at soccer but nobody really cares

I wish my accounting homework would complete itself

[SideshowBob]

Granted, its completed but now you can't find it because it handed itself in to a different professor.


I wish I had a cold beer right now.

[Bipolar]

Granted, its completed but now you can't find it because it handed itself in to a different professor.


I wish I had a cold beer right now.

Granted, but it is a beer found underground that is 50 years old and when you drink it it starts to cause your body to rot from the inside out and there is no stopping the worms which will spew from your carcass and infect the rest of the world. Congrats, you just killed humanity.

I wish I could go home. :cry: And stop being so damn down.

[Agitator7834]

Granted, but then you were slapped in the face by the corpse of Rick James for crying and being down all the damn time.

I wish I had a girlfriend again.

[tsmo]

Granted, but then you were slapped in the face by the corpse of Rick James for crying and being down all the damn time.

I wish I had a girlfriend again.

granted, She only costs $1200 a month to maintain, Her parents are direct spawns from hell, and her gay brother keeps begging you for anal.

I wish the next 8 hours flies by

[Jabooty_3]

granted, but during which you are so thoroughly distracted that you let teh zombies win and the world is now doomed :(

I wish I had some sweet skillz

[kulotsalot]

granted, but during which you are so thoroughly distracted that you let teh zombies win and the world is now doomed :(

I wish I had some sweet skillz

granted, but you're too chicken to ever use em.

i wish i could get rid of all my allergies.

[tsmo]

granted, but you're too chicken to ever use em.

i wish i could get rid of all my allergies.

granted, Your last sneeze imploded your head

I wish I had another good dream about the mod with the bod

[mstad]

granted, but in this dream she's fucking you with a golf club.






I wish I wasn't getting sick.

[xevious]

granted, but everyone else gets sick and dies, leaving you with no webrats and no poon.

I wish I was tattooing more customers already.

[Thunder888]

Granted, but the customers turn out to be all the webratters wasting time in this thread and we all want tats on our footsoles forcing you to swim in toe jam for a week.

I wish for a really witty answer next.

[licupssy]

Granted, but the customers turn out to be all the webratters wasting time in this thread and we all want tats on our footsoles forcing you to swim in toe jam for a week.

I wish for a really witty answer next.

Granted but you have to have Xevious tattoo it on your butt and post photos of it on the BOTH forum!

I wish North Korea was relocated to the south pole....

[tsmo]

Granted but you have to have Xevious tattoo it on your butt and post photos of it on the BOTH forum!

I wish North Korea was relocated to the south pole....

Granted. and now the world is being threatned by nuclear bomb pops.

I wish I was invisible

[joerockhead]

Granted!!! You are invisible, but you are locked in a Mad scientist celler with Jabooty!


I wish my Camaro had over 500 HP!

[kulotsalot]

Granted!!! You are invisible, but you are locked in a Mad scientist celler with Jabooty!


I wish my Camaro had over 500 HP!

granted, but your feet don't reach the pedals :tongue:

i wish it would quit being sooooo cooooold.

[clt_capt]

Granted - Booty will warm you up

I wish I had a picture of Kulots in a schoolgirl outfit

[tsmo]

I wish I had a picture of Kulots in a schoolgirl outfit


so do I.. :mags:

[joerockhead]

Granted - Booty will warm you up

I wish I had a picture of Kulots in a schoolgirl outfit


so do I.. :mags:


Granted, but you both find each other has the same pic, and in your jealousy, shoot each other's dick off!



I Wish I was the Ruler of the WORLD!!!!

[Draggon]

Granted, but you both find each other has the same pic, and in your jealousy, shoot each other's dick off!



I Wish I was the Ruler of the WORLD!!!!
Granted...But the world that you rule is in Sector 7G and is void of all female life forms within 10,000 light years and doesn't have the resources to produce electricity.

I wish the Canucks would win the Stanley Cup.

[SMonty30]

granted, but noone cares coz its canada :p

i wish i could *insert something id really want* before i die

[mstad]

Granted, you get to be in the middle of a 100 man circle jerk before you die. :bukkake:


I wish my iguana would hurry up and grow so I can put a leash on him and take him outside.

[Graffin]

granted, but he grows so big he bites your leg off.

I wish I could know the questions for my midterm before I take it.

[clt_capt]

granted, but he runs away to live with someone cool

http://uploads.webrats.com/files/74/lizard.jpg

I wish this thread was more interesting

[SMonty30]

granted, but it was only coz you were banned from posting in it :)

i wish my computer would work properly for once

[Queso]

granted, but in return, satan eats your soul

i wish people wouldn't skip over wishes about midterms

[SideshowBob]

Granted, but the only thing you can now do on the computer is play Minesweeper.



I wish I drove a nicer car.

[Queso]

granted, but now you type really slow


I wish i had a neverending supply of cheese

[SideshowBob]

granted, but it is all 100 year old, moldy goat cheese.



I wish my job paid me more.

[Queso]

Granted, you're now the highest payed cock sucker in the world.



I wish I was smoking mstad's pole.

[SMonty30]

granted, but its burned completely in the ordeal, and it aint cuming back

i wish i was romantically attached to graffin

[Draggon]

Granted....and that's as flipped as it gets.

I wish The new Building Code wasn't written by lawyers

[tsmo]

Granted....and that's as flipped as it gets.

I wish The new Building Code wasn't written by lawyers




granted, the new building code is written by Imperial Fleet Commanders and now you have more fire power than you can possibly imagine.


I wish I had a working lightsaber http://uploads.webrats.com/files/41/lightsaber.gif

[Graffin]

granted, the new building code is written by Imperial Fleet Commanders and now you have more fire power than you can possibly imagine.


I wish I had a working lightsaber http://uploads.webrats.com/files/41/lightsaber.gif


Granted, but the switch is backwards and when you turn it on you stab yourself.


I wish I had more time to play video games.

[koЯnut]

Granted, but the switch is backwards and when you turn it on you stab yourself.


I wish I had more time to play video games.



Granted....but the only game you ever get to play is E.T. The Extraterrestrial. Maybe the worst game ever.


I wish I had a hat as cool as Graffin's.

[tsmo]

Granted....but the only game you ever get to play is E.T. The Extraterrestrial. Maybe the worst game ever.


I wish I had a hat as cool as Graffin's.


granted,. not only do you have a cool hat, now every guy in the bar hits on you.

I wish I could finish my stormtrooper outfit.

[Lucky13]

Granted....but the only game you ever get to play is E.T. The Extraterrestrial. Maybe the worst game ever.


I wish I had a hat as cool as Graffin's.

Granted, but you can never take it off, that includes the shower.

I wish that I could participate in a high stakes heist.

[Graffin]

Granted, but you're stealing from Paris Hilton and she catches you and makes you eat her leather baseball mitt coochie.

I wish I didn't have a midterm the day after Halloween.

[Lucky13]

Granted, but you're stealing from Paris Hilton and she catches you and makes you eat her leather baseball mitt coochie.

I wish I didn't have a midterm the day after Halloween.

Granted, but it's moved to Halloween night.

I wish I had a turkey sandwich.

[tsmo]

Granted, but you're stealing from Paris Hilton and she catches you and makes you eat her leather baseball mitt coochie.

I wish I didn't have a midterm the day after Halloween.


granted, the day after Halloween is now the ONLY day of the year you dont have a midterm.

I wish I played professional football

[Draggon]

Granted...You now play Slot for the Saskatewan Roughriders

I wish David Caruso was off TV forever

[Graffin]

Granted, but now he's performing Shakespeare in your house every night.

I wish I had a machine to make me sober up so I could get super drunk all the time and still drive home.

[Draggon]

granted...but you only get to drink with your Mum and you can only drive a Moped

I wish the GF didn't snore

[licupssy]

granted...but you only get to drink with your Mum and you can only drive a Moped

I wish the GF didn't snore

Granted but now she wets the bed!

I wish my wife win the lottery...................

[tsmo]

Granted but now she wets the bed!

I wish my wife win the lottery...................


granted, she comes home and tells you to pack your shit cause she just won the lottery, you ask where youre going and she replies. "doesnt matter, just GTFO"

I wish I was kidnapped by 3 sex starved vixins who put me to use in thier sexual fantasies.

[Draggon]

granted...you now take it from there fat redneck father every morning and night.

I wish I was a jedi master

[tsmo]

granted...you now take it from there fat redneck father every morning and night.

I wish I was a jedi master


granted. just as you make master, order 66 is executed and you die in a hail of laser fire.

you never even get to put on the master robe :(


I wish I had a chick here blowing me right now

[licupssy]

granted...you now take it from there fat redneck father every morning and night.

I wish I was a jedi master

Granted but every time you have sex you're interrupted by Obi-Wan saying use the force Draggon, use the force!

I wish I had a double quater pounder with cheese..............

[Queso]

granted, but it's a quarter pound of cawk


I wish i had a slurpee

[tsmo]

granted. but its not the slurpee from 7/11, no, this one comes in the form of a man between your legs because your always wet. SLLLLLLLLLuuuuRRRRRRppppEEE

I wish I was musically talented.

[SMonty30]

granted, your now randy newman

i still wish i had sum more @ money :(

[clt_capt]

granted - Now you are Deuce Monty - Manwhore

I wish we could have another Halloween thread

[Queso]

granted. but its not the slurpee from 7/11, no, this one comes in the form of a man between your legs because your always wet. SLLLLLLLLLuuuuRRRRRRppppEEE

and that's bad how? besides, i've already got one. :mstad:


granted - Now you are Deuce Monty - Manwhore

granted, but juan castrates you for it.


i wish the kid here didn't have a duck call noise maker

[Draggon]

Granted...He now has a boating airhorn that has an infinate (sp...Graffin, you going to correct me?) air supply.

I wish they'd stop working on the lines so I had the internet all the time today

[Cheeba Monkey]

granted... unfortunately, however, they hooked the wiring up wrong, so the only sites you can visit are filled with the cawk.

I wish I had a sealable container that every time you opened it, it would refill to the top with the funkiest bud imaginable, that when I smoked it, I really could fly.

[Queso]

granted... unfortunately, however, they hooked the wiring up wrong, so the only sites you can visit are filled with the cawk.

I wish I had a sealable container that every time you opened it, it would refill to the top with the funkiest bud imaginable, that when I smoked it, I really could fly.
granted, but you come down from the high while flying and fall to your death


i wish Bush didn't suck ass so much

[Cheeba Monkey]

granted, but you come down from the high while flying and fall to your death


i wish Bush didn't suck ass so much

granted, but now he sucks way too much cawk.

I wish I had a computer that would write "A" papers for me.

[Queso]

granted, but now he sucks way too much cawk.

I wish I had a computer that would write "A" papers for me.
granted, but they're all written in swedish


i wish my financial aid was paid off

[licupssy]

granted, but they're all written in swedish


i wish my financial aid was paid off

Granted but you graduate with honors and find out your degree is useless except for as a film editor of a portuguese porno company!

I wish I was a portuguese porno actor.....

[Queso]

Granted but you graduate with honors and find out your degree is useless except for as a film editor of a portuguese porno company!

I wish I was a portuguese porno actor.....
granted but it's all gay porn and you're the reciever.


i wish i had some taco bell

[Draggon]

Granted....but it's stale and rotting and make you horribly sick

I wish I didn't have to watch Americal election ads.

[joerockhead]

Granted....but it's stale and rotting and make you horribly sick

I wish I didn't have to watch Americal election ads.


Granted, but instead, you are on the campaign trail with the most hated person you ever imagined and you are always taking the heat for Kerry's stupid remarks.


I wish I was good looking to women!

[SMonty30]

granted, fat ugly manic depressed women :S

i wish i was leading a better life

[Cheeba Monkey]

granted, but your girlfriend gets jealous of your new found piety and slits your throat while you are sleeping.

I wish I wasn't so morbid.

[licupssy]

granted, but your girlfriend gets jealous of your new found piety and slits your throat while you are sleeping.

I wish I wasn't so morbid.

Granted but your John Kerry and you and in a comatose state and think you won the presidential election!!!!!

I wish the elections were over.....

[SMonty30]

granted, you got elected as the man in charge of getting booty sum ass, and female ass at that :o, over 16 too <.<?

i wish i was *doing sum hot sexy things* with *some female member of webrats* >.>

[maggiesdragons]

granted, you got elected as the man in charge of getting booty sum ass, and female ass at that :o, over 16 too <.<?

i wish i was *doing sum hot sexy things* with *some female member of webrats* >.>


Granted but what you didn't know is it was kpeeze.

I wish my laundry would get clean on its own.

[Draggon]

granted...but it's then shipped to Edmonton for no reason and dumped into the tar pits.

I wish I was witty and funny

[SMonty30]

granted, but your so fucking annoying with your wit, your the loneliest man in the earth ever :O

i wish i had a gf right now :S

[tsmo]

granted, but your so fucking annoying with your wit, your the loneliest man in the earth ever :O

i wish i had a gf right now :S


granted, You get Jabooty as your wingman. all the chicks flock to you.

I wish I had a bigger truck

[SideshowBob]

Granted, you now have a truck the size of an aircraft carrier. Top Speed, 3 miles per hour.


I wish that fast food was good for you.

[Queso]

granted, but it's made of babies


i wish i had my lizard now instead of tomorrow

[joerockhead]

granted, fat ugly manic depressed women :S


That is already true!!



i wish i had my lizard now instead of tomorrow


Granted, but tonight, the first thing it does is pee in your face, the start humping you all night like a norny Lizard!



I wish that John Kerry was a stuck in IRAK with us oither dumeze!

[Draggon]

Granted...but you have to have him cover your flank.

I wish Zito would sign with the Red Sox.

[Queso]

wish granted, but no one cares about baseball

i wish ren and stimpy was back on tv with awesome new episodes

[Draggon]

granted, but you are no longer allowed to watch TV, unless it gay porn...

I wish BP the best in his new job.

[Queso]

granted, but you are no longer allowed to watch TV, unless it gay porn...

I wish BP the best in his new job.
there's something wrong with gay porn? :dunno:

granted, but you get fired



i wish k-fed to never make music again

[Anibal]

there's something wrong with gay porn? :dunno:

granted, but you get fired



i wish k-fed to never make music again

(has he ever made music ?)

granted, but he will continue to do the pathetic and vomitting stuff he has be doing so far

i wish i was cooler than booty

[Jabooty_3]

not possible

granted, but nobody likes that USC quarterback right now anyways so it doesn't mean all that much

I wish I had a cool topic for my 7500th post

[Graffin]

Granted, but it's about your extensive penile bruising from all the wacking off you do.



I wish I could make out with Jennifer Love Hewitt
















again...

[Draggon]

Granted, but to do so you also have to make out with Rosie O'Donnell.......again.

I wish Elisha Cuthbert was my personal sex slave.

[Agitator7834]

Granted, but Jack Bauer gets to watch you do her just once, then kill you afterwards with a swift twist to the neck.

I wish I could play guitar like Jimmy Page.

[mstad]

Granted, but Jack Bauer gets to watch you do her just once, then kill you afterwards with a swift twist to the neck.

I wish I could play guitar like Jimmy Page.
Granted. You die in a plane crash with him, now niether one of you can play because you're both dead.




I wish these fucking terrariums would clean themselves so I can play my Family Guy game.

[Waffle]

granted but while cleaning themselves they become self aware and embark on a mission to destroy life on earth. they don't make it more than 20 feet or so, but they leave a path of destruction in their wake. actually, destruction might be too strong a word. but stuff has definately been knocked out of place.

i wish people posted more sheep

:josher:http://uploads.webrats.com/files/453/flame.gif

[Draggon]

Granted, but they are always lead by and followed by cawk pictures.

I wish the GF wasn't moving away.

[Graffin]

Granted, but now you're moving away.

I wish I was in Canada eating poutine right now!

[jabber]

Granted, but you get one anyway and then...It doesnt come true.

I wish I could fly.

[adog8me]

Granted, but you get sucked into the engine of a 747 and die a horrible death.


I wish I was the worlds richest man

[clt_capt]

Granted but you are 90, impotent and married to a fat bitch who is trying to kill you

I wish whoever answers this gets a bad rash

[Queso]

granted, but it ends up being the cure to cancer and i become rich beyond my wildest dreams


i wish for my lizard. oh wait, i bought him 30 minutes ago :msatd:

i wish i was playing katamari damacy right now

[SMonty30]

granted, but you get rolled up by it :O

i wish i didnt feel so depressed

[jabber]

Granted, but you get one anyway and then ... it doesnt come true

I wish I could fly

[jShizz]

Granted, but you get one anyway and then ... it doesnt come true

I wish I could fly

Granted, but I stab you in the eye for wishing something that has been wished already

I wish I had a vitamin water

[joerockhead]

Granted, but it really piss, and you have to drinkit all.


I wish I had a flat Screen TV

[maggiesdragons]

Granted, but it really piss, and you have to drinkit all.


I wish I had a flat Screen TV

Granted, but now everything in your life is flat, soda, women, and your member.



i wish I was thinner

[xevious]

Granted, but a midget runs out while you are setting it up and steals vital pieces of the structure, thus destroying the integrity of the monstrous beast tv, which then falls on you, killing you slowly, while you depend on a scorpion so nourish you.

[SMonty30]

the thread kindo got messed up didnt it <.<

[Queso]

Granted, but a midget runs out while you are setting it up and steals vital pieces of the structure, thus destroying the integrity of the monstrous beast tv, which then falls on you, killing you slowly, while you depend on a scorpion so nourish you.
bebop...cola...GOOD!!!

http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/1681/sealab1vp.th.jpg

i wish this thread would get back on track

[xevious]

granted, but then it gets derailed again and we all die in a fiery......fire.

I wish I wouldnt die in a fiery fire.

[SMonty30]

granted, you die im sum sex related death

i wish i wasnt so tired again :o

[xevious]

granted, but you never sleep again, go crazy, and die in a fire because you think youre cold. :mstad:

I wish the shit I'm thinking about would fucking happen or not happen.

[SMonty30]

it happens, and urm, you get a beer, sum cake, and a load of porn to celebrate

i wish i wasnt such a fuckup llolol

[licupssy]

it happens, and urm, you get a beer, sum cake, and a load of porn to celebrate

i wish i wasnt such a fuckup llolol

Granted but you become so good on the job that you make you boss look like an ass so he has you fired!!!

granted, you got elected as the man in charge of getting booty sum ass, and female ass at that :o, over 16 too <.<?


I wish I was 20 years younger to be able to complete the task given me from my last granted wish (At my age I might not have enough time to finish the Job!)....

[SMonty30]

:o

[joerockhead]

Granted but you become so good on the job that you make you boss look like an ass so he has you fired!!!



I wish I was 20 years younger to be able to complete the task given me from my last granted wish (At my age I might not have enough time to finish the Job!)....


Granted, youhave the energy, but r4ealize you have no control and blow your wad 10 seconds into the session, making all the women laugh.
and Never again getting sex.


I wish I could eat more food!

[SMonty30]

granted




























fatty!

i wish i could touch maggies bewbs (coming over from the thread statement i just made)

[maggiesdragons]

granted






fatty!

i wish i could touch maggies bewbs (coming over from the thread statement i just made)

Granted, but now everywhere you go all you can think about are my huge tracts of land, causing you to loose your train of thought...bad things may happen.






I wish I had a boyfriend

[jShizz]

Granted, but now everywhere you go all you can think about are my huge tracts of land, causing you to loose your train of thought...bad things may happen.






I wish I had a boyfriend

Granted, but you are much smarter than he is and end up bashing his head in because he can't do simple math.

I wish I didn't have to take Nathan to swim lessons today

[monarch]

Granted, but now you have to watch him drown. [you're from San Diego? what part?]


I wish I had a nice big rack.... of ribs.

[SMonty30]

granted, they are your own, time to die

i wish i didnt have the flu

[jShizz]

granted, they are your own, time to die

i wish i didnt have the flu


Granted, but instead Xev does and that makes you :cry:

I wish I had a personal shopper

[procol]

Granted, but instead Xev does and that makes you :cry:

I wish I had a personal shopper

Granted, but it is goodwork & all he buys for you are youtube videos of stupidity from Japan.

I wish to have no wishes.

[SMonty30]

granted, you die because you have nothing to wish for, and lack of dreams and aspirations

i wish procol didnt try and kill the thread :o

[Waffle]

granted, now procol doesn't try to kill the thread, he just flat out does it (kill or do not kill, there is no try)

i wish i wish i handt killed that fish

:josher:

[Queso]

granted, but the fish killed you


i wish i didn't have to work tonight

[Waffle]

granted but tonight the world will be taken over by zombies and the only safe place within 30 miles will be your place of employment. of course by the time you get there, the folk inside will have already blocked off any possible enterance and you'll have to face the zombie horde on your own (tsmo will be on vacation). also, there's a good chance a zombie might puke on you before the night is thru.

back to an earlier wish of mine that never got flipped:
i wish mooses were tamed and replaced bikes as a short distance means of transportation

:josher:

[clt_capt]

granted, but you are gored in a head on moose collision.

I wish booty would just go get some and quit whining about it.

[Waffle]

granted but he gets the herp and makes a thread about it, with pics, which goes on to become the new 25300

i wish law school had less work and more high seas adventures

:josher:

[Agitator7834]

granted, but now that you are on the high seas Leviathan eats you whole after he takes your ship down.

I wish I wasn't failing 3 classes right now =(

[jShizz]

granted, but now that you are on the high seas Leviathan eats you whole after he takes your ship down.

I wish I wasn't failing 3 classes right now =(

Granted, but instead you are passing all of your classes with extremely high grades, and thus have no friends.

I wish someone would make the dinner tonight so I don't have to

[clt_capt]

Granted, but the MSG in the chinese food you roder gives you a bad headache

I wish this thread were more interesting

[Agitator7834]

granted...snore...yeah its almost impossible to make this more interesting.

I wish 9 o'clock would come sooner so i can see Family Guy that i've been waiting for a month to see.

[Queso]

granted, but your tv and every tv you try blows out


i wish satan would send me a twisted bunny rabbit for christmas

[Jabooty_3]

granted, but it's simply a regular wabbit with a twisted ankle or whatever, it's crying is annoying and drives you to stabbing yourself in the thigh with a steak knife

I wish I didn't have to take my lame ethics test tomorrow

[jShizz]

granted, but it's simply a regular wabbit with a twisted ankle or whatever, it's crying is annoying and drives you to stabbing yourself in the thigh with a steak knife

I wish I didn't have to take my lame ethics test tomorrow


Granted, but instead you have to take the Proctology State Board exam

I wish Wenesday would be here already

[Agitator7834]

granted, but because the day "Wenesday" doesnt exist the world goes into a time splitting vortex and everyone dies because the sun blows up.

I wish Led Zeppelin would reunite.

[SideshowBob]

Granted, but Jimmy Page and Robert Plant both forget how to play guitar and sing.



I wish I had a giant fish tank full of colorful, tropical fish.

[Jabooty_3]

granted, but there is no water and you now have hundreds of dead fish

I wish to have some alcohol induced fun soon

[licupssy]

granted, but there is no water and you now have hundreds of dead fish

I wish to have some alcohol induced fun soon

Granted but you wake up in bed with a catholic priest and realize the sacramental wine had a mickey in it!!!!

I wish I had a double quarter pound with cheese, Super size the coke and hold the fries..........

[maggiesdragons]

Granted but you wake up in bed with a catholic priest and realize the sacramental wine had a mickey in it!!!!

I wish I had a double quarter pound with cheese, Super size the coke and hold the fries..........


Granted, but after that all you get are the fries,


I wish that Linda would get fired.

[tsmo]

Granted, but after that all you get are the fries,


I wish that Linda would get fired.



granted,. shes fired in a huge kiln,. and now your forced to keep her in a corner of your room as some fucked up piece of cermic art.

I wish I could play world of warcraft from work.

[Agitator7834]

granted, but you get fired because your boss saw the episode of South Park in which it makes fun of WoW and he signs you up for physical therapy and makes you take a 6 month non-payed "vacation" because you have "no life". Congrats. lol

I wish I was James Bond for a day

[SideshowBob]

Granted, but its the day when one of 007's gadgets don't work and you die a horrible, fiery death at the hands of some enemy.


I wish that election campaign ads were outlawed and offending candidates would be fined one billion dollars.

[CD]

Granted, but the candidate wins and cheats the taxpayers out of $2 billion...

I wish I understood the females... if that's even possible.

[Waffle]

granted, you now have a complete understanding of all female organisms in the universe, but the immense amount of knowledge flowing into your mind all in a single moment drives you crazy and you spend the rest of your days living in the wild and nailing the occasional fat chick that happens by. also, when the knowledge floods into your brain, you crap yourself.

i wish the WoW expansion and the Wii were already out and there were enough in stock for everyone

:josher:http://uploads.webrats.com/files/453/flame.gif

[tsmo]

granted, you now have a complete understanding of all female organisms in the universe, but the immense amount of knowledge flowing into your mind all in a single moment drives you crazy and you spend the rest of your days living in the wild and nailing the occasional fat chick that happens by. also, when the knowledge floods into your brain, you crap yourself.

i wish the WoW expansion and the Wii were already out and there were enough in stock for everyone

:josher:http://uploads.webrats.com/files/453/flame.gif


granted, but then the enconomy comes to a screeching halt. The Worlds addiction to gaming spreads like wildfire after the release, leaving citys bare and towns empty as billions cram into dark basements everywhere....

I wish I could do math in my head

[Waffle]

granted, but then the enconomy comes to a screeching halt. The Worlds addiction to gaming spreads like wildfire after the release, leaving citys bare and towns empty as billions cram into dark basements everywhere....

just for the record, i'm totally ok with that


as for the wish
granted, but now you can't do english

i wish i had an unbreakable and untangleupable slinky that was always in perfect working order

:josher:http://uploads.webrats.com/files/453/flame.gif

[adog8me]

Granted but you are stuck on a barren flat island with nothing for it to slink down


I wish I had X-Ray vision

[Jabooty_3]

granted, but they only work the shorts of old, fat, hairy dudes

I wish my stats professor wasn't mentally challenged and would actually teach us something, thus giving us a logical base of what to know for our exam on thursday

[tsmo]

granted, but they only work the shorts of old, fat, hairy dudes

I wish my stats professor wasn't mentally challenged and would actually teach us something, thus giving us a logical base of what to know for our exam on thursday


Granted. He pulls a scene from Monty Pythons Meaning of Life, and brings his wife into the classroom to teach you how foreplay works, and how to fuck a woman... Test is Thursday Booty, get to it.

I wish I could reach in my front pocket, and pull out a $20 bill everytime.

[Waffle]

granted, but they are all canadian $20 bills and are thus rendered worthless to any civilized person

i wish that i could set things on fire with my mind and that fire and explosions wouldnt burn or hurt me at all

:josher:http://uploads.webrats.com/files/453/flame.gif

[tres28ram]

I wish my kids would move out, "again", so I could drink my coffee in my skivvies

[Agitator7834]

granted, but your neighboor sees you having coffee in your skivvies, takes pictures, and posts them all over your neighboorhood and you become the town's laughing stock.

I wish tres28ram granted Dr. Weird's wish.

[maggiesdragons]

granted, but your neighboor sees you having coffee in your skivvies, takes pictures, and posts them all over your neighboorhood and you become the town's laughing stock.

I wish tres28ram granted Dr. Weird's wish.


Granted


i wish that i could set things on fire with my mind and that fire and explosions wouldnt burn or hurt me at all

:josher:http://uploads.webrats.com/files/453/flame.gif

Granted But you caught me on fire and then I exploded

I wish my kids would move out, "again", so I could drink my coffee in my skivvies



I wish that I didn't have to go to the store to get things to make dinner with.

[Draggon]

Granted, But you now live in the grocery store and it's open and busy 24/7.

I wish I was an oscar meyer wiener.

[tsmo]

granted. now millions of kids everywhere sing, my balogna has a first name, its d r a g g o n..

I wish I could complete a pass on Monday Night Football.

[jShizz]

granted. now millions of kids everywhere sing, my balogna has a first name, its d r a g g o n..

I wish I could complete a pass on Monday Night Football.

Granted, but your teams loses every.single.time

I wish this thread would make it to page 2 and die a firey death

[SideshowBob]

Granted, but your teams loses every.single.time

I wish this thread would make it to page 2 and die a firey death


Granted, but then you create another thread, and it replaces this one, but it is pointless and misguided as this is.


I wish jShizz would spare us the Dr. Frankenstein lamenting about the monster she created. :mstad:

[SMonty30]

granted, urr wtf does that mean

i wish i wasnt so bored easily

[maggiesdragons]

granted, urr wtf does that mean

i wish i wasnt so bored easily


Granted, now everything is entertaining to you, you follow the mail man because of his keys and you don't know how you got lost.


I wish I had a bigger kitchen

[licupssy]

Granted, now everything is entertaining to you, you follow the mail man because of his keys and you don't know how you got lost.


I wish I had a bigger kitchen

Granted but you find that you the head of the busiest Restuarant in New York and have to work 16 hours a day to keep up the business!

I wish I had a tastykake....................

[SideshowBob]

granted, but its a five-year old tastykake you found under the seat of your car.



I wish I didn't have be up at 4 for work tomorrow.




btw, the Dr Frankenstein wish meant that jShizz started this thread and now regrets it

[mstad]

granted, but its a five-year old tastykake you found under the seat of your car.



I wish I didn't have be up at 4 for work tomorrow.




btw, the Dr Frankenstein wish meant that jShizz started this thread and now regrets it
Granted, now you have to be up at 2am.


I wish my iguana would eat the cricket sitting next to his food dish staring at him instead of the lettuce I just gave him.

[tsmo]

Granted, now you have to be up at 2am.


I wish my iguana would eat the cricket sitting next to his food dish staring at him instead of the lettuce I just gave him.

granted, but now his taste for meat goes unwarranted, as he grows and grows until he is the size of the lizard in that god aweful Godzilla wanna-be movie. the military has to be called in. He destroys the entire city before being shot and killed... and you get to cover all the expenses.

I wish I could be as creative as I used to be.

[mstad]

Granted. But now, you're so creative that you've lost interest in slaying zombies, and you get bitten by one.



I wish I could find a decent house to rent in my price range.

[Queso]

granted, but it smells of cat piss and nothing you do will get the smell out


i wish i mstad find a decent house to rent so i could have more animals

[Draggon]

granted...and you get a tiger that bites off his peter.

I wish teh fries were done.

[clt_capt]

granted - the fries are done, but you burn your lips bobbing for them

I wish the election was over

[Queso]

granted, and everything/one you voted for lost

i wish it was next week so i could get my new lizard cuz the other one was a dumbass and died :usuck: